Drowning
by BugeishaKyasarin
Summary: Ami and Usagi abandon their duties and run off to Earth, the latter to be with the one she loves and the former hoping to find something meaningful. That 'something' turns out to be a 'someone' instead. Crystal Tokyo era. One-shot.


_The tide is coming, I don't know if I can take it_

_I lose my focus, lose my focus_

_With every breath I feel my inhibition breaking_

_I can't control it, no, no, no…_

* * *

Ami wakes from a forgettable dream and sighs quite despondently. It is almost as if she is fading away from herself, as though her psyche wants to separate from her physical body to reclaim the state of bliss it used to know. That is where all her dreams have gone along with her ambition, her reason to live. She looks out the window of Mariner Castle, now exuding a sigh of longing.

'_I know it's out there…'_ she thinks. _'I know my purpose is just waiting to be discovered.'_

"Queen of Mercury" is not as glamorous a title as it initially seemed. She was appointed the task by the citizens of the Crystal Asian Alliance– _they _elected her for this position. Granted, as the guardian of Mercury it made the most sense why she would be chosen to rule, but that did not automatically prepare her for the role of matriarch.

Usagi was different. She had been groomed since birth to inherit the Moon Kingdom yet chose to defect to the path of love by traipsing off with Endymion. Sadly that path had resulted in their deaths, but there was no way she could have known. Nobody could have known about the dissent in Beryl's heart. Now, however, she was fulfilling her duties as the rightful ruler of the Moon Kingdom, Neo-Queen Serenity. And Mamoru had even been elected as Japan's king! It was a bit tragic that they had to remain separated to adequately do their jobs. Usagi's plan was to live with him in Crystal Tokyo as soon as Chibi-usa came of age to rule the Moon on her own. However, she had not been conceived yet.

In the Crystal Millennium it seemed everyone had a distinct purpose to fulfill. People who wanted to help others became scientists and doctors. People who wanted to abolish ignorance became teachers and humanitarians. But Ami did not know what she wanted to be, therefore she did not know who she truly was. Becoming queen had swiftly quelled her plans to become a doctor, a neurosurgeon to be specific. One simply could not accomplish both. She gazes at her reflection like she does not recognize herself, wondering if her friends still do.

Suddenly a handmaiden appears, a slender girl wearing a cerulean dress, the court color of Mercury. "Her Majesty Neo-Queen Serenity is here to see you, Your Highness." Ami thinks the message contains too many formalities as she descends the staircase from her chamber. Usagi is waiting in the royal kitchen, sampling tarts prepared by Ami's personal chef; she thinks it is much too early for sugary treats.

"Good morning!" the pale blonde young woman says cheerily. This immediately makes Ami stare at her suspiciously because Usagi is not a person who regards the morning in any positive manner. She wipes the crumbs of a strawberry tart from her mouth, leaving the chef anxious. "Delicious!" she announces, flashing the beautiful smile that makes everyone adore her. The chef proffers the tray of sweets to Ami but she declines with the smallest head shake, leading her friend into the aquarium so they can converse.

"What are you doing here?" Ami's visage is shadowed by the dim lighting but Usagi's inner glow illuminates her expression clearly. She looks first surprised, then consoling.

Her voice is soft– it is the voice she will use to sooth Chibi-usa. "Doesn't it seem like ages since we were last on Earth? I worry so much time will pass I'll forget Mamo-chan's face."

"You will never forget him," Ami reassures. "Love is unforgettable."

"I know… Of all people, I should know. I mean, we've been in love since the Silver Millennium! That was thousands of years ago, so why would I forget him now?" She places her hand on the cool glass as fish swim all around her. A silent moment goes by, then she turns toward Ami wearing a veil of utter anguish. "I _need_ to see him, Ami-chan. I know you're the only one who can come up with a plan to get us to Earth."

"Us?" Ami repeats. "You want me to go with you?"

Usagi smiles. "Well, of course! I can't just leave you here in this dreary castle. Honestly, have your decorators liven things up a bit! They could at least throw some colorful fish into this aquarium."

"It _is_ a bit bland," Ami agrees, pondering her request. Getting to Earth was simple enough– one only had to set the portal coordinates to a Crystal point and there you were. But in order to not get caught someone had to reset the portal to its neutral state. There was one person she knew would be willing to aid their great escape. "We're going to Neptune," she grins.

Michiru smiles upon hearing the request and nods without saying anything. She, Ami and Usagi return to Mariner Castle and the Queen of Mercury covertly enters Crystal Tokyo's coordinates. She and Usagi step through, then Michiru swiftly inputs her coordinates and leaves the marble foyer. Their guards incorrectly assume the ladies have all gone to Triton Castle.

* * *

Usagi and Ami enter a golden hall and the guards stationed synchronize a low bow. "Hello, good day…" they utter while briskly walking to the throne room. Mamoru instantly stands up; he and Usagi run into each other's arms and hold a kiss so long Ami fears suffocation. "Good morning, Mamoru," she says while trying to stifle a grin at the romance-novel moment.

"M-morning, Ami-san," he replies, their lips barely separating. Then it becomes obvious they are trapped in the lover's spell and Ami sees herself out. She has no idea how long Usagi wants to stay and no idea how to pass the time. On the steps of the palace she pauses, shaking her head. They can each return to their respective planets from here and their guards will be none the wiser. She can return now if she really wants to. But really, she does not.

Ami wishes she were wearing something other than the strapless blue gown with a long train; she has to gather it up and carry it at her side lest someone trips over it. She wanders around the imperial district of Crystal Tokyo, marveling at how things have changed within just one year of the formation of the Crystal Asian Alliance. Every building is made from climate-efficient materials with solar panel roofs. Everyone shares the energy gathered and any extra is sent to an enormous storage facility underground. Automated water systems traverse modern aqueducts disguised beneath overpasses and along the road; they lead to community gardens and a purification plant also buried beneath the city.

Along with the many technological advancements made by the CAA there also came a renewed sense of humanity. People no longer walked like robots with eyes glued to their cell phones and cars did not fill the streets at all times. Everyone was healthy so everyone walked, and if the commute was too far there were electric busses and cars to take. Complete strangers were constantly exchanging smiles, waves and compliments. Ami absorbed all this information and had to sit down once returning to the Golden Palace's courtyard as her head swam with humbling thoughts. She had contributed to the improvement of millions of lives both human and animal. She had helped strengthen the planet as a whole by getting people to respect and care for it. She and her friends had ushered in an unprecedented era in human history. They had helped create this utopia.

'_Was that my purpose?'_ Ami muses. She used "was" because it had happened, it was here and now and done with. If it had been her destiny to reshape the world and become Queen of Mercury, why was she still so… unsatisfied? She always used to take pride in her work. Certainly Crystal Tokyo is a beautifully glittering gem to admire on the face of the planet, but something is still missing. It perturbs her that she cannot figure out what.

The clash of steel abruptly pierces her thoughts. Combat is taking place before her and she wonders how she grew so disconnected from reality as to miss the procession of guards that now forms a loose square around several similarly yet better-dressed men; four, to be precise, wearing ornamental armor over plain pants and changbao. _'An interesting style for Mamoru to choose'_ she thinks while watching three of them brandish swords. The largest man with wavy brown hair and red armor accents hefts a zweihander and wildly swings it around, soliciting protests and insults which make Ami giggle. Apparently she was a little loud because the four men glance at her. Three of them return to the matter at hand, one does not.

He has loosely curled golden hair like some kind of Greek god. Ami meets the bright green eyes surveying her without shying, even lifting her chin and squaring her shoulders. This makes the man smile though it's a bit crooked, devilish. He is the slimmest of the four and withdraws a rapier from the sheath at his side, swishing and slashing the air. While Ami watches this man and the very muscular red man duel, she sees him continue to glance over which makes her blush. _'Pull yourself together! You're no longer in high school!'_ She knows he is showing off– that much is evident by his graceful yet overdramatic moves and flourishing when he bests the red man. They huddle together for a minute and Ami pretends to be interested in the flowers beside the bench. Out of the corner of her eye she catches the blond man striding toward her.

"Good morning, milady," he says when he is an arm's length away.

Ami casually faces him and takes in his appearance from toe to head. Up close the outfit looks nice, but it is different than the standard guard uniform, so she wonders what his role in the palace is. "Good morning, sir."

"Would you be willing to indulge a question of mine?" Ami nods. "What are you doing here all by your lonesome?"

Her eyes grow wide at the odd inquiry. "I… am enjoying the natural beauty of the Golden Palace!"

"I can only assume you were here before us." He motions to his comrades, then narrows one eye to scrutinize her. "You've been here for quite some time, haven't you? And you've wept."

At that Ami's hand flies to her cheek. It is damp, much to her chagrin. What could have possibly made her tear up without noticing? "H-how can you tell?" she asks, feigning positivity.

The man lowers to one knee which brings them to eye level. He lifts a hand to her cheek and gently traces the tear streak with one finger which is enraging yet comforting all at once. Ami smacks the finger away. "You dare lay a hand on me… without _permission?_ Do you know who I am?!"

"Of course," the man smirks.

What an irritating expression. "Yet you invade my personal space as if it holds no consequence?"

"I know the Queen of Mercury is too reserved to punish such an insignificant transgression."

She really dislikes this man's arrogant attitude. How dare he presume to know her! Just to spite him she _will_ punish him! "I demand your name, sir," she pointedly says.

This time he bows in a grand sweeping motion. "Nishino Komoku, general of King Endymion's western armies."

"G-general?" Ami stammers. He is one of the commanders of Mamoru's global forces! How on earth did she not recognize his attire? She quickly composes herself because a general certainly does not outrank a queen. "I shall seek Endymion's opinion in this matter. If he deems your actions uncouth I shall have no choice but to subject you to punishment in my kingdom."

Komoku scoffs at the threat. "How bad could that be? What would I have to do, scrub your aquarium?"

Now he was insulting her! With a huff Ami stands, her face mere centimeters from his own, conveying all her authority into the stare she delivers him. She sees mischief and intrigue in his eyes, maybe a slight hint of fear as well. He does not think she is serious! Wait until she has him dangling over the orca whale tank by his toes, then he will fear her without hesitation! Just as she turns to march into the palace, Komoku throws an arm out. "You must have come here with Her Majesty Serenity," he says, giving her another lopsided grin. "You should know that the reason why we're out here is because she and the king are…" He quirks an eyebrow and scrunches his nose. "Frankly, milady, they're making love all over the palace."

Ami blushes profusely. "Oh… Oh my. Well… I suppose there shouldn't be any interruptions, then."

"Our thoughts as well, Your Majesty," the man almost snickers. He is definitely treading on thin ice. "Perhaps you would enjoy learning how to handle a sword?" He offers the hilt and Ami frowns slightly. If she ever desired instruction on the rapier she would contact Haruka, an expert at fencing.

"Thank you for the offer, but I must decline." Komoku shrugs and turns to leave, but Ami stops him. "Do you know if there's a public pool in the imperial district?"

The man, for some reason, is grinning from ear to ear. "There's one in the eastern courtyard, milady. Allow me to show you there." Ami accepts and begins hauling her dress over the lawn. Komoku follows her with a victorious gesture to his comrades.

* * *

The pool is not nearly as magnificent as the one in Mariner Castle, but it is completely open to the sky and supports the growth of water lilies and reeds, making it seem more like a man-made lake. Dragonflies dart over the pink and white blossoms avoiding collisions with large bumble bees. The surface of the water is interrupted by gerrids and the koi trying to eat them. The pool is a microecosystem and for a moment Ami wonders if she should be interfering; she turns to Komoku with guilt in her features. "What are you waiting for?"

"It's just so peaceful… I don't want to disturb their environment."

"The reason all these plants and insects are here is because the king has never swam in it, not since the day it was filled. Someone needs to take advantage of this thing so it may as well be you." He faces the gate again as if guarding Ami from intruders. Minutes tick by and she still stands at the edge of the pool like a statue. She _really_ wants to swim– it's the only thing she knows will adequately pass the time. With a sigh she presses a button on her bracelet and the gown metamorphoses into a bathing suit. The clever device was developed by Luna and Artemis who combined all the senshi's communication watches with disguise pens, which held data on five outfits at any given time and simply rearranged fabric molecules into other garments.

Ami still stares tentatively at the water, not noticing that Komoku has shifted slightly and is enraptured by her reflection. Her skin holds the soft, subtle radiance of ivory and is absolutely unmarred. He already knows her eyes are as blue as the water she gazes into and just as deep, full of mystery and secrets. The Queen of Mercury is not one for wasting time and her hair reflects that; it is short and easily managed with long bangs swept across her face. She has a petite, slender frame and well-toned arms and legs from years of indulging in her favorite hobby. The swimsuit is an intriguing cut and color too exotic for any normal woman to wear. Komoku wonders who designed it as he watches Lady Mercury's reflection move to the deep end.

Her knees bend and her arms swing back, then she dives into the water with nothing more than a slight splash and a few ripples. The buzzing insects hardly take notice, but Komoku does. The water is clear enough for him to watch her swim to the shallow end and he is mesmerized by how natural she seems while submerged. Even the koi swish their tails alongside her, welcoming her to their world. When Ami surfaces her smile is pure and without any trace of doubt– she is genuinely happy, blissful even, which causes his heart to swell with pride. He would trade all the sword practice in the world to ensure that smile never fades.

The sun moves from its morning throne to its twilight seat and lingers there, casting adumbral rays over the Golden Palace. Everything seems even more surreal as Ami lifts herself onto the shallow edge of the pool, instantly shuddering in the cool air. Komoku detaches his cape and wraps it around her without thinking.

And there is a spark.

Ami initially looks grateful and parts her lips to say thank you, but nothing comes out. She is transfixed by the selflessness she sees in his eyes, eyes the color of everything lush and new and exciting. She wonders if the vitality she first saw in them is what inspired her to stop feeling so downtrodden. People all over the planet were enjoying their lives to the fullest, so who is she to continue moping around feeling sorry for herself? She is a queen; she has the power to do anything she wants! She wants to feel happy again, to be fulfilled.

"Thank you…" Ami eventually says after averting her attention to Komoku's breastplate.

"For what?" he murmurs.

"For showing me this place. It has been a long time since I last did something for myself. I was starting to believe that…" Her words trail off and she gives the tiniest smile.

Komoku raises an eyebrow. "What? What were you thinking?"

Ami shakes her head. She knows how torturous it is to withhold information from people who need to know everything, like her. But she is not trying to be mean, she just does not want to make herself vulnerable. The only person with whom she unabashedly shares her feelings is Michiru; even Usagi is unaware of the darkness she has been slowly spiraling into. Now she has found a light to grasp.

Suddenly she gasps as the man pulls her against his chest. He radiates warmth that ignites her heart and blooms in her cheeks. His strong arms support her when her knees weaken without being overbearing. The embrace is… comfortable. But why? This man is a stranger yet is holding her as though he has done it before, like he knows this is what she needs. She resists the initial urge to wrench herself away, her typical reaction to one of Minako's hugs, releasing a pent-up breath instead.

Komoku does not know why he is holding her either. During the moment it happened it felt like someone else was controlling him, an omniscient puppet master able to give Lady Mercury what she truly needed. _Safety?_ She is not in any danger. _Protection?_ Perhaps only from the chill of dusk. _A friend?_ All the queens of the solar system are her greatest allies. What if she needs someone to care for her in a different way, someone to help ease the burden of her duties and reassure her that the people of Mercury are grateful for everything she does even though they cannot constantly tell her so? _'Is that person… supposed to be me?'_ the man inquires of the higher power. If it is, there should be a sign.

He receives it in the form of Ami herself. She lifts her head to meet his gaze once again and her eyes… seem more familiar. Some of the mystery has dissolved and he cannot figure out how he knows her better now than mere moments ago. The way her lips beckon him is familiar, too. Komoku thinks he used to kiss them fervently, passionately, sometimes with wild abandon. He thinks the kisses used to escalate to other pleasurable activities accompanied by the sound of tumbling water blended with shuddering breaths. _'Fountains…'_ he thinks, _'Mariner Castle is full of fountains… There's even one in her bedroom…'_

Komoku remembers lying beside her and listening to them as they lull him to sleep. He remembers the feeling of her naked skin against him as he wakes in the morning, and no matter how carefully he extricates himself from the silk sheets she always stirs, sometimes opening one eye and stretching enticingly to summon him back to her side. He remembers all this because it happened before, in their past lives, during the Silver Millennium. _'Does she know as well?'_ There is only one way to find out. He closes his eyes and presses his lips against her own.

At first Ami is stunned, unable to even articulate the thought of reacting. She has never been kissed before. _'This is my first kiss…'_ she finally realizes, _'…and I don't even know this man!'_ Another moment goes by and she starts to recall that in fact she _does_ know him. She is no stranger to any of this. Not his face, his attitude, his scent, or his body… Yes, she knows every curve of his leanly muscled physique quite well. She used to be intimate with this man, the one named…

"Zoisite," Ami whispers against the kiss. He withdraws to give her a shocked look which quickly softens; he almost seems ashamed of the name. "You've been… reborn. All the Shitennou."

Komoku closes his eyes but not before Ami glimpses the regret they contain. "I'm aware of that. I'm also aware that we defected to Beryl's regime when she was resurrected by Queen Metalia, and we committed unspeakable acts in our quest for the Ginzuishou." His embrace loosens a little. "I understand if you would rather forget me. Pretend I don't even exist."

Ami's hand falls on his chest, the simple action making his pulse race. "I can't do that. I remember _everything_ about us, everything that happened despite Queen Serenity's desire to keep the kingdoms separated. When Serena met Endymion and began sneaking off to Earth, I was the first guardian she told." She gasps at the sudden revelation: history has repeated itself today. _'Could this really be destiny?'_

They stare at one another in silence. The sun has almost finished setting; magenta and orange clouds splash the horizon. "You know…" Ami quietly says, "I came here with Usagi to escape my duties. I was running away from my problems, my emotions… But I ran right into the one person who can help me deal with them. Assuming you're willing to listen, that is."

Cue the repartee. "I would rather listen to the things you breathe into my ear, such as _yes_, _more_, and _don't stop_."

"What makes you think you'll get the chance to hear those things?" Ami demands. Instead of answering he leaves a trail of ardent kisses on her neck. It is a very convincing argument. They enter the Golden Palace, enter the portal to Mariner Castle, and enter her chamber. A fountain flanked by topiary shrubs is burbling away in one corner while Ami giggles and takes in sharp breaths during the process of shedding their garments. The sound makes Komoku feel truly alive– he knows it is not a dream or a flicker from his past incarnation but something that irrefutably proves his humanity. "Ami…" he says, steadying himself against the tide of dizzying emotions, "…I love you."

Her fingers are entwined in his hair as she vacantly stares back. Komoku begins to worry that something is wrong when a sneaky, impish grin splits her lips. "I know."

* * *

_This was originally written for a challenge over at AO3 but it developed into a work describing my vision of the Crystal Millennium. Interestingly it turned out to be exactly 4000 words._

_Lyrics are from the song "Drowning" by Armin van Buuren and Laura V from the album "Mirage"._


End file.
